Monday, December 12, 2011

For those who love getting married

Times have suddenly becomes strange as many friends of mine who were just months ago trying to fall in love with different girls at the same time are now being attracted towards falling into the bliss of marriage, just like a   colorful,confident,tiny insect falls into waiting arms of a beautiful Venus fly trap plant.

In the span of less than 8 months we (me and my friends) have lost many bachelors who have very bravely, smilingly embraced the culmination of their youthful days.

The poignancy of the whole situation becomes more visible when someone from among is sitting on the stage, exchanging smiles with the not so curious onlookers who have deliberately assembled in the marriage venue to celebrate the imposing of tons of responsibility and the taking away of a much rejoiced freedom of a young man. 

Many friends of mine have already taken this walk which ends with they being transported to the other world. A world where suddenly the expectations of acting in a more mature way increases. A guy who just few weeks back would become 'high as a sky' in a pub and do all kinds of eyeball grabbing activity, is forced to assume the serenity of Buddha once he gets married. And on top of it he dismisses the change in his behaviour with an embarrassing grin. "Yaar Shaadi ho gayee hai ab".

The demise of a young restless wandering soul comes quickly and swiftly.

And this is not a stray incident. It has been happening since ages but one doesn’t realize the enormity of the whole issue until someone who is close starts preparing for marriage.

And make no mistake, this is equally true for both love and arrange marriage.

The boy in some cases and his parents in most of the cases decide that the time has come when the boy should turn into a 'man'. And the next thing that you hear is music coming from a Shahnai- the long bugles that reminds you "Boss you are getting married", just in case you have still not understood the reason for the sudden increase of Hullaballoo near you.

One fine morning you cell phone rings and you realize that it’s your Lucknow wale "Mama' calling. “Abhee tak soey huey ho. Aisa kaise chalega, shaadi honey waali hai and you are still continuing with your 'bad' habits.

Now who can make the Mamaji realize that this habit has been always there and will be there? Just because of an immediate marriage one cannot reasonably expect the sleeping pattern to change.

And the indications of the looming handmade self invited ‘disaster’ comes from different quarters.

You step out of the house and a smiling maid greets you and confides to her friend “Inhi bhaiya ki shaadi hai agle mahine". Your chest swells with pride and you give her an arrogantly timid smile and walk away. Only to realize later that you have never seen the maid before. Then you are struck by a more important realization- Why was she smiling? Was it a smile that comes with pity? Or it was a smile that a butcher gives to a goat who is going to meet its surreal ending.

But then the bombardment of SMS congratulating you on your new endeavour, the attention that is showered by the so called 'friends' who had promised to be with you in bad times and the attentiveness of the tailor who measures your body for that perfect wedding suit, makes you forget the ‘tragic’ end that is still some days away.

The white Ghodee ( The one with a twitching tail who will take the groom to the final alter, a place of no return), the intoxicated high on Govinda Baraat and the colourfully decorated guests all play their role in keeping you distracted from realizing what you are going to lose.

You are going to lose what someone like Mel Gibson had shouted out loud when he was put to death in the movie Brave heart-- FREEDOMMMM!!!!!!! But obviously no one thinks about Brave heart during these times for the mind is making future plans, wandering across ocean and drawing caricatures in the sand of a beach in Maldives or rowing a boat in the canals of Venice.

Many do realize this colossal lose when they still have time and they try to savour those very last moments of  their independent existence with a conglomeration called Bachelors party, which interestingly and ironically celebrates the very fact that a bachelor is going to lose away his status of being a bachelor.

How discouraging it can get more? But then one can take heart from the fact that this travel into the other word is rather inevitable, something which everyone however mighty will undertake at one point or the other, including yours truly.

I am sure the bride too goes through her own pre-marriage 'happiness' but to comment on that would be like writing on LOIKNSOAA- which frankly put is something that I do not have much expertise on and neither does the god, Google.

-----To marriages made in heaven and to those who gave it a human touch on earth.

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